Everyday I watch as a very thin mother carries her school going child to the bus stop. “Can’t she walk?” I asked, fearing there was a problem with the little one’s legs. “She’s very sleepy,” explained the mother.
I had thought when the child passed to a higher class this would stop, but the mother continues carrying her sleeping child to school, nearly doubling over with the weight.
Quite often I see fat, overweight children going to school, over weight arms swinging in gay abandon as a mother follows like an ass carrying their heavy school bag. The mother walks patiently, lovingly, happy to this small job for her child, who she loves very much.
But is this doing the child any good?
Today parents go to the school not to hear what the teacher has to say about their children but to argue with the teacher that there is a fault with her teaching, or that the boy sitting beside her son, won’t allow him to concentrate, “My son failed because his partner disturbs him” says the teacher. The teacher sighs, because a few moments ago, the other boy’s parents had said the same.
A child who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wants, will develop an “entitlement mentality” and will always put himself first. He will be ignorant of his parent’s efforts. If we are this kind of protective parent, are we really showing love or are we destroying our children instead?
You can let your child live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch movies on a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with you. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them the right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as all the mothers they see around.
The child then learns to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.
Also, you are not going to be there when he or she faces a problem in their office later, or in their marriage and if you’ve been doing all their fighting, they won’t know how to handle problems.
So stop carrying your child, physically or mentally and you’ll have a strong adult you will be proud of..!
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Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.
Very succinctly put across. Child does expect every desire of his to be fulfilled. Detrimental to development.
Factful and eye opener writing.
That’s what current reality goes between parents and children. Then kids start disrespecting others coz they don’t respect their parents for serving things without realizing.
Not only in the home but in school also community service should be encouraged.In the AGBethel church I go to is amazing.Doctors, Engineers, Teachers etc etc go all out in service of the Church.Toilets are cleaned, floors mopped , traffic controlled, etc it’s amazing.Seeing is believing.
You are right Robert ! Children grow up with entitlement mentality, as parents are so overprotective and try to blame others for what their children do not achieve. Parents seldom give the teachers a chance to explain, as they themselves have developed conversational narcissism. And both these traits continue to grow and are so deep rooted in adults . A time comes when we cannot differentiate between adults and children as both behave in like manner !