Quite often at parties, just when people are balancing plates of kebabs, laughing loudly, and trying not to spill soft drinks on expensive sarees, somebody suddenly shouts across the room, “Bob, will you say a prayer?” Immediately there is silence. The music volume drops. People straighten themselves as if God…
Robert Clements is a journalist and newspaper columnist. With an estimated 6 million readership, his column, Bob’s Banter is published in over 30 newspapers and magazines in nearly every state in India, as well as in the top newspapers of Bangladesh, London and Dubai and is also translated into Hindi, Punjabi and Urdu.
How We Love to Exclude..!
How we love excluding people. Everywhere I go I see signs that politely, firmly, and sometimes proudly keep people out. “For Members Only.” “Residents Only.” “Parking for Office Bearers.” “Private Function.” And the more exclusive the place, the bigger the smile on the face of the person who belongs inside….
Umpires and Election Commissioners..!
Imagine a cricket match where only one team is allowed to choose the umpire. The other team can complain. They can object. But finally the decision rests with that one team. Would we call that cricket? Not for one second. Television commentators would explode with outrage. Former cricketers would hold…
The Good, The Bad and The Ugly..!
Last evening I went to watch The Good, the Bad and the Ugly with two younger friends. Three men walking into a theatre as though we ourselves had just ridden in from the Wild West. I looked carefully at my companions before entering. One of them had paid for the…
Worldly Success and a Successful Coach..!
My father died around twenty-five years ago. Strange how fathers become clearer after they leave. While they are alive, we are too busy arguing with them, avoiding them, or pretending we know better. But after they are gone, their voices quietly return. Sometimes in the middle of a conversation. Sometimes…
Personal and Public Life..!
“His personal life has nothing to do with his politics!” I have heard that sentence shouted with great confidence whenever a politician is caught in some scandal involving affairs, dishonesty, manipulation, or questionable behaviour. And every time I hear it, I wonder whether we have all quietly lost our common…
Eyes on the Right Goal..!
A few years ago I sat through a very long motivational talk. The speaker shouted passionately about hard work. “Work hard!” he thundered. “Success comes only through hard work!” For nearly an hour he attacked laziness, praised discipline, and probably frightened half the audience into buying diaries and waking up…
A National Cheating Tutorial..!
“When did cheating become clever?” I asked a friend the other day. “Since winning became more important than honour,” he replied. And that answer has stayed with me. I watched the Tamil Nadu political drama unfolding and wondered what exactly is happening to our democracy. The Governor’s post was never…
Do You Pray for Our Country?
Every morning we hear some terrible news: Riots somewhere. Corruption somewhere else. Children harmed. Leaders shouting. Wars brewing. Prices rising. Hatred spreading faster than kindness. And after reading all this, almost everybody says the same sentence in despair: “What is happening to our country?” Or even more dramatically: “What is…
The Great Indian Plastic Container Mystery..!
“Where are the lids?” That was the scream that came from our kitchen one Sunday morning. A scream every Indian family knows very well. The scream of somebody trying to find the correct lid for a plastic container. I walked in bravely to help. Big mistake. Because what followed was…
Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.