Make me a match
Find me a find,
Catch me a catch
Look through your books
and make me a perfect match.
And as the strains of Fiddler On The Roof’s, Matchmaker chorus fades away, I wondered how the local matchmaker was faring what with so many online matrimonial sites flourishing. I found her or rather she found me; she was just outside my door when I stepped out, “You look troubled!” she said quickly.
“Yes,” I said, “I’ve been wanting to see you!”
“I know! I know! I heard fighting last night!”
“You did?” I asked startled.
“Last night wasn’t too bad, but it becomes worse!” she said knowingly, “and it’s better to start looking around now itself! There’s this widow in the next colony, or would you settle for a divorcee? There’s also a twenty something girl who wouldn’t mind a father figure, though she’s a bit of a plain jane if you ask me!”
“Whoa! Whoa!” I shouted, “what you heard last night were cats fighting in my house, here I even got scratched trying to separate them!”
“Oh!” said the matchmaker looking disappointed, “I was going to approach your wife in the evening, now I’ll have to go elsewhere for business!”
“So that’s how you’re getting business! You are finding matches for already married people!” I said crossly.
“We have to survive Bob, so we keep our nose close to the ground and our ears close to windows and doors for signs of marital discord! Last week I saw Mr Singh getting into his car without opening the door for his wife and now I’ve got her interested in Jaswant round the corner!”
“Ye gads!” I whispered, “you’re rather clever aren’t you!”
“What with these online sites flourishing, I could be out of business if I didn’t use my ingenuity!” said the matchmaker as she peered at me through her horn rimmed spectacles.
“Tell me who is better!” I said finally getting down to what I wanted to talk about, “you or those matrimonial agencies?”
“We matchmakers of course! Those agencies don’t know nothing,” said the matchmaker defiantly, “when I introduce a couple to each other, I’ve done my homework, I’ve studied both of them thoroughly, till I understand their every characteristic and know they are made for each other!”
“And I guess you guarantee a couple a life time of bliss?”
“Not anymore Bob, not anymore,” she whispered, “now after five years like a headhunter I’m at their window with a new offer. Times have changed; we’ve got to survive. Now about that widow I was talking about, she’s quite pretty when she wears black!”
“Matchmaker, I’m happy with what I’ve got!” I tried to shout even more loudly as I stared aghast at my window opening and my wife smiling at her..!
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