Hiding My Marksheet..!
This morning’s paper had me dumbfounded; most students who had passed their exams had scored over ninety percent. I called home immediately: “Lock my cupboard and hide the keys!” “Why?” asked the wife, “something you want to hide from me?” “Just lock it!” She didn’t. The cupboard was open and…
Coffee, Tea or Me..!
My morning cuppa’s been getting some good press lately: Last week she was featured as a preventive for diabetes and then the papers reported that a cup a day keeps memory loss at bay! Ha! And to all those people who’ve stared at me as I sip my daily addiction…
A Bank Strike..!
The other day I heard the banks were on strike! My neighbour who works in a bank, owns two flats next door, and who has just bought himself a new motor car, all through zero percent interest loans, that his bank makes available for him, sat on his balcony on…
Garbage Hacker..!
The scream came from the bedroom, “Lizard?” I asked casually from the sitting room and found no reply, “Cockroach?” I shouted again, and again hearing no answer rushed to where the wife was, “What’s wrong?” I asked. “Look at this!” she screamed shoving the newspaper into my face, “look what…
Make Me A Match.!
Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make me a match Find me a find, Catch me a catch Matchmaker, Matchmaker Look through your books and make me a perfect match. And as the strains of Fiddler On The Roof’s, Matchmaker chorus fades away, I wondered how the local matchmaker was faring what with so…
Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.