Government offices in one western state in our country have reportedly been instructed to display photographs not only of the Chief Minister but also of his two deputies. I immediately felt sorry for the poor government officer. Where, I wondered, will he put the photograph of his wife and children?…
Robert Clements is a journalist and newspaper columnist. With an estimated 6 million readership, his column, Bob’s Banter is published in over 30 newspapers and magazines in nearly every state in India, as well as in the top newspapers of Bangladesh, London and Dubai and is also translated into Hindi, Punjabi and Urdu.
Air India Building and Government Babus..!
There are some views in Mumbai that should come with an entrance fee. Marine Drive at sunset. The Gateway standing proudly against the sea. And the magnificent view from the iconic Air India building. You stand there, look out over the Arabian Sea, and immediately feel capable of earning another…
Storytelling Competition..!
There is a storytelling competition going on across the world. Not in schools. Not in literary festivals. Not even in bookstores. This one is far more exciting. Because, the prize is total destruction. The contestants are not authors like me, sitting at desks with cups of coffee beside them. They…
Trash..!
Last night at the gymkhana I pressed the lift button to go down, the lift, however, had other ideas. It went up. I stepped out and immediately wondered whether I had accidentally reached the municipal garbage department. The room was covered with paper. Not decorated with paper. Covered with paper….
Speaking of Dad..!
Something I have noticed over the years has always puzzled me. People love talking about God after He has done something for them. A man gets a promotion and immediately stands up in church and says, “Praise God, He gave me a better job.” A woman recovers from illness and…
The Missing Instruction Manual..!
Last week I bought a small microphone. Nothing complicated. A simple gadget that helped transfer my stage whispers and soft asides to the recording machine. When I opened the box, out fell an instruction manual as thick as a doctoral thesis. There were warnings, diagrams, troubleshooting charts, maintenance schedules, and…
Gratitude Heals the Past..!
Some people seem to carry the past around like an old suitcase. The suitcase is torn, the handle is broken, and the contents smell musty, but they refuse to put it down. Every now and then they open it, pull out an old hurt, dust it lovingly, and tell everybody…
A Black James Bond..!
I have been following the debate about who should be the next James Bond, and one name keeps popping up like an unwanted advertisement on YouTube. Idris Elba. Every few months somebody says, “He should be Bond!” Then somebody else says, “No, he shouldn’t!” Then a third person writes a…
The Cockroach’s Last Laugh..!
This must have taken the wind completely out of the sails of the ruling dispensation. For years they had a favourite weapon. It was ridicule. Every speech, every television discussion, every social media exchange seemed to contain the same word aimed at the opposition leader. “Pappu.” It was repeated so…
Lockdown, Cracks, and Uneven Flyovers..!
There was a time when a lockdown meant a dangerous virus was roaming the country. Today it means the people setting the NEET examination papers have been locked away from society till June 21st so they don’t leak the questions. Imagine that. Two weeks in isolation. No friends. No family….
Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.