A Longer, Whiter Beard..!

It was on one of these Zoom calls that this pretty friend asked, “What’s with the beard Bob?”
“I’ve always had a beard!” I replied quickly.
“True, but you’re suddenly growing it longer!”
“So that you will start believing in me!” I said a little angrily.
“You mean you’re growing the beard to influence me?” asked my pretty friend.
“Well,” I said, “Desperate times require desperate measures! I’ve been writing articles for you to read, advising you for the last few months, and you don’t seem to be listening to me, so I decided on the beard!”
“You think I’ll believe you more, with a longer beard?”
“Aren’t you?” I asked, “What do I look like now?”
“Certainly not a journalist,” she said, “You look more like a saint!”
“Aha, and you do believe in what saints tell you, don’t you?”
“Yes,” she admitted, “that’s certainly true!”
“In fact,” I said, “there are a couple of gurujis now available for their talks on video, whose every word is being lapped up, and do you know what is working?”
“Their beard!” said my friend with a giggle.
“Yes,” I said, “If you had seen them without a beard, and I have some pics of them without one, let me tell you, you wouldn’t have given them a second glance, leave alone, listening to them!”
“So, it’s all in the beard!” pondered my friend.
“No, not just a beard!”
“A long one!” she said.
“Yes,” I said, “and a white one! That shows wisdom, knowledge, patience and long suffering!”
“But yours is not fully white Bob?” she asked, and I was quite happy to realize that people as young as she, scrutinized me so well, “You have a lot of black in your white?”
“It’s just a matter of days!” I said.
“They’ll grow white?” she asked.
“No, my Amazon delivery will come!” I said, “And the white hair spray I’ve ordered will arrive!”
“You’ll look every bit a priest then,” she said, “Like a sanyasi!”
“That’s the idea!” I said, “I want people to stop taking me lightly, and to believe every word I say. I want people to think I am a holy and upright man, who is concerned about them. I want people…”
“Stop, stop!” cried my pretty friend, “You mean to say, you can achieve all this by throwing your razor and scissors away, and with a can of white dye?”
“Well,” I said with a clever smile, “You won’t even be asking me these questions once the Amazon man comes, you’ll just accept every word! See you next week!”
I waited for her to get off Zoom, then switched on the TV to see others like me, following my ‘believe in me’ method, “Mitron!” said a figure on my TV, “It is a good formula..!”


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8 thoughts on “A Longer, Whiter Beard..!”

  1. Looking like a saint with a long white flowing beard is fine. But if mistaken for Santa- clause, one should be ready with gifts for children and adults alike !

  2. Hahaha! Great punch line to a humorous advice of a long white beard adding to the weight of one’s words! It seems to be working. It draws and holds attention of the bored, lonely, rich or diffident. We must watch and pray, said Jesus. Trust Him and His Word to stay blessed. He’s good to all.

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