‘Twas just before the Covid wave a friend called, “I’ve got tickets for the IPL matches, want to come Bob?” “You crazy?” I asked him, “I’ve got my old TV and where else can you watch 18 balls being bowled per over?” “There’s only six balls Bob!” “On my TV…
Vantage Vintage View..!
Tears Behind a School Song..!
This happened before Covid shut schools down. The call came while I was out. “Please come and hear your song.” It was the headmaster of a school. He had asked me some time ago, to write the school anthem and I had done so, I guessed it was now ready…
Sorry..!
Quite often I see an apology in the newspapers for some news item wrongly reported, or see a crime movie where the slick lawyer says, “I’m sorry your honour!’ But in both cases, I know it was either the fear of litigation or repercussions from His Lordship that brought on…
Moving Out of Your Comfort Zone..!
“What’s that?” asked the little child pointing to a huge shell on the ground. “It’s a shell, with a snail inside it!” I explained. We both looked at it awhile, and slowly I saw the snail’s head coming out and two beady eyes looking at us. Then the snail, slowly…
Putting Crosses on Your Shoes..!
“The Christian shoemaker does his duty not by putting crosses on the shoes, but by making good shoes.” Martin Luther A few years ago, a close friend of mine, whose daughter was getting married asked me to come down to his city to help him with wedding arrangements. “Praise the…
A Showpiece Dagger..!
It’s a small showpiece dagger I hold in my hand, a present from the Mayor of Batangas in the Philippines, when I’d visited the country many years ago. He was a young mayor and I heard quite a gangster and war lord. There was a reception at the mayor’s palace…
Enjoy Your Joy..!
My wife, a medical doctor, is quite strict about the sweets I am allowed to have, and when she does give me permission, laughs as I take it, sit on my favourite rocking chair, and relish the delicacy! “Why are you closing your eyes?” she asks chuckling away. “Because I…
Car Fun..!
What part of the car causes the most accidents? Ans: The nut that holds the wheel! Opened the newspaper this morning and found a whole supplement devoted to cars so I said, well if you can’t beat them, join them and decided to devote today’s column to car fun! When…
The Helpful Sounds of Silence..!
A wise old bird sat on an oak- The more he saw, the less he spoke, The less he spoke, the more he heard, Lord make me like that wise old bird.-Anon For two weeks I’d stopped carrying my phone. My friends thought I was crazy. “Bob!” they cried, “we…
Position, Power, but NO People..!
He was the Bishop of the local churches and also Chairman of a charitable organization of which I was a board member. Pompous and plump, he quite enjoyed chairing the meeting, especially after the general secretary had fallen sick and he had the attention of everybody. We discussed matters at…


Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.