My neighbour who has a habit of poking his nose in my business, stood outside my house, as I dismantled the grill, unscrewed the heavy steel door, and opened the thick wooden shades, “What are you doing?” he asked. “Freeing the women in my house!” I explained patiently. “You mean…
Robert Clements is a journalist and newspaper columnist. With an estimated 6 million readership, his column, Bob’s Banter is published in over 30 newspapers and magazines in nearly every state in India, as well as in the top newspapers of Bangladesh, London and Dubai and is also translated into Hindi, Punjabi and Urdu.
The Long Spoon Vaccine..!
Despite instructions, warnings and pleading from the government to abstain from lighting firecrackers, this Festival of Lights, the pleas fell largely on deaf ears. Dense smoke and deafening blasts of crackers bursting, clearly revealed the unconcerned people we really are. The allegory of the long spoons is a parable that…
A Bloodied Country..!
“Yours is one helluva bloody country,” exclaimed my English friend as he walked out of the airport. “On the contrary,” I protested, “we are a very peace loving, non violent people.” “Then why all the bloodshed,” said the Englishman. “Bloodshed?” I protested again. “Yeah there’s blood all over your land….
Giving Advice..!
“The only thing one does with advice is to pass it on. It is hardly used by oneself….” Oscar Wilde How good we are at giving advice! We dish it out free and give it to all who pass by, “Come take it’s free!” we shout, put our arms around…
Doing Right and Being Wrong..!
Years ago I remember going over to the school my children were studying in. I met the teacher and asked how my daughter was doing. “She’s good,” said the teacher, “she knows all the answers but hesitates to put up her hand!” “Why?” I asked bewildered. “She’s scared to be…
Leaders, Lend Your Ears..!
A few days ago, two ex IAS officers spoke on, “Dissent in Democracy’ and since I was on the panel I said, that dissent in a democratic setup was not just disagreement about certain policies, but a citizen saying, “Please listen to me! I too have a viewpoint on the…
Becoming Childlike..!
A few years ago I watched astonished as Jeff, my huge, scary German- Shepherd dog, became a little pup and followed my nephew around the room, nuzzling into his ear and behaving as if he’d found a long lost friend: All my nephew had done had been to walk into…
Exit Polls..!
“Mama!” “Yes my son?” “The exit polls said, I and that thirty one year old boy would win in Bihar!” “I know my son, but they were wrong! On top of it you lost quite miserably!” “But the exit polls did not say that! I think we should make the…
Transferring the Wife..!
The quarreling in the house at the end of the road, had been going on throughout the night and finally the neighbours, unable to sleep called the police. “Sir,” said the inspector as he entered the house and looked at the elderly couple. “You both are making too much noise,…
Sir Niceness Throws out Mr Trump..!
Sir Niceness, nearly lost out in the four years that the White House was occupied by a boorish, loud, arrogant president, and though many reasons have been attributed to his downfall, despite fulfilling many of his promises, most voters, at least a little over half of America, wanted someone nice…
Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.