Don’t Mess with Cockroaches..!
There was a time when the ruling politicians frightened people with enemies across the border. Then they frightened us with enemies next door. Then with enemies from another religion. Then with enemies from another caste. After that they looked around desperately and probably even suspected the neighbour’s Labrador retriever of…
Umpires and Election Commissioners..!
Imagine a cricket match where only one team is allowed to choose the umpire. The other team can complain. They can object. But finally the decision rests with that one team. Would we call that cricket? Not for one second. Television commentators would explode with outrage. Former cricketers would hold…
A Netflix India..!
The other day we were clutching our collective hearts over a robotic dog that turned out to be less Make in India and more Made Somewhere Else. For a brief shining moment, we were united in embarrassment. How could we present a Chinese pup as our very own desi Doberman…
The Galgotias Iceberg..!
When I first read about the Galgotias University robotic dog that turned out to be a Chinese import wearing an Indian nametag, I felt an unexpected wave of nostalgia. This is exactly the sort of thing a classmate did in Standard Three. He submitted a drawing of a horse that…
Disagreement Isn’t Disloyalty…!
The other day I made the mistake of saying I didn’t agree with a certain policy of the government. I should’ve just confessed to treason and asked for a firing squad. You see, in today’s patriotic India, there’s only one kind of citizen allowed—the clapping kind. The kind who applauds…
Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.