Today, as I opened the morning paper, my coffee nearly turned cold. There it was, staring me in the face—Bihari women had each received ten thousand rupees, not from some benevolent businessman, not from a charitable trust, but from our tax money. Ten thousand each! And with a smile added:…
Robert Clements is a journalist and newspaper columnist. With an estimated 6 million readership, his column, Bob’s Banter is published in over 30 newspapers and magazines in nearly every state in India, as well as in the top newspapers of Bangladesh, London and Dubai and is also translated into Hindi, Punjabi and Urdu.
Three Young Men..!
This morning, as I sipped my coffee and scanned the news, I nearly spilled my hot brew. There on the world stage, strutting about and shaping the destiny of millions, are three young men: Donald Trump at seventy-nine, Narendra Modi at seventy-five, and Vladimir Putin at seventy-two. I say young…
Don’t Want to be a Doctor..!
The newspaper headline stared at me like an unblinking eye: “Boy with 99.99% ends life on day of departure to medical college.” A teenager from Chandrapur, Maharashtra, bright as a shooting star, ended his own story before it had even begun. His suicide note said it all: “I don’t want…
Very ‘Positive’ Talks..!
Today nothing serious okay, just a fictitious tale! Ruby and Jai met in New York. Ruby’s country couldn’t care less what he said; Jai’s country counted each minute he spent with the other man. Finally, Jai returned and announced proudly that the talks were “positive.” Now, how do I know…
Swadeshi and My Maruti 800..!
There’s something about the word Swadeshi that makes the chest swell and the voice quiver with patriotism. We picture Gandhi at his spinning wheel, khadi clothes fluttering, and villagers proudly making salt. Today, the Prime Minister thunders about Swadeshi, and dutifully, like good children of the soil, we nod our…
Visas, Tariffs and Doing Unto Others..!
I sat this morning and saw headline after headline of India and Indians being targeted abroad. In America, Trump’s tariffs, visa upheavals and deportations hit businessmen and students. In England, placards scream against “outsiders.” In Australia and Ireland, fists and words are raised against Indians. And as I watch our…
Prayer Power or Perturbed Pacing..!
Ever stood outside an ICU? If you have, you’ll know the scene. A husband walking up and down like a tiger in a cage, muttering under his breath. A mother wringing her hands, glancing at the closed doors every second. A son staring at his phone but not really seeing…
Birthday Celebrations and Democracy..!
A few days ago, newspapers greeted us with full page ads all trying to outdo each other in wishing the PM on his birthday. We also watched lavish celebrations and wondered whether we were still a democracy—or whether we had quietly slipped into some ancient monarchy. Streets decorated, speeches thundered,…
No One to Talk To..!
Many years ago, my secretary, who used to travel by the good old suburban trains of Mumbai, told me stories of the strange therapy sessions that happened on the rails. Total strangers, wedged together on a wooden bench, would whisper their deepest troubles. She once confessed to me that she…
Crossover Doctors..!
Let’s start with an imaginary neighbour of mine. One week she was treating patients with tiny sugar globules wrapped in tissue paper, the next she was prescribing antibiotics strong enough to bring down an elephant. “Dual practice,” she told me with a proud smile, “I’m both a homeopath and an…
Robert Clements is a newspaper columnist and writes a daily column, which has graced the pages of over 60 newspapers and magazines, from a daily column in the Khaleej Times, Dubai, the Morning Star, London, and in nearly every state in India, from The Statesman in Kolkata, to the Kashmir Times in Kashmir to the Trinity Mirror in Chennai.