Racism and Royalty..!
‘Pussycat, pussycat where have you been?
I’ve been to London to visit the Queen
Pussycat, pussycat what did you do there?
I frightened racism under the chair!’
After Big Brother, Shilpa’s sure going places and on World Commonwealth Day she was invited to meet the Queen at Westminster Abbey in London! Shilpa — reportedly wearing an intricate purple velvet Tarun Tahiliani sherwani — curtseyed before the Queen, and then almost slipped in her high heels! Apparently Prince Philip smilingly told her to be careful about the shoes, averting the fall.
After that the actress delivered a speech on….you guessed it… racism..!
“Racism!” muttered Prince Philip smiling benignly at the glamorous actress, “our English women need to teach this woman how to walk with shoes first!”
“Why don’t these natives walk bare feet like they do at home instead of coming all the way and tripping on the royal carpet!” thought a royal courtier nodding at Shilpa as she emphasized a point.
“Wonder what all the kings and queens laid to rest here are goin’ to think with this woman from the colonies telling us how to treat Her royal subjects!” thought a bored Lord as he waited for Shilpa to finish her speech and then fell asleep on the pew.
The crowd clapped appreciatively and the Prince thinking the speech was over continued clapping till the Queen poked him and beckoned silence. “Where’d she learn to speak so much?” he complained.
“In the Big Brother show!” whispered a courtier and the Prince nodded, “That Jade’s a good teacher huh!”
“Not very good!” said the courtier.
“What d’you mean?” asked the Prince as the Queen glared at her husband.
“Can’t understand a word! What language she speakin in?”
“Queens English!”
“Which queen?”
Both clapped as the rest of the crowd clapped, then giggled at their own little joke. The Queen frowned at the Prince and the courtier. The Lord who had gone to sleep in the pew got up suddenly and was pulled down by his lady, “I thought her speech was over,” said the Lord sheepishly.
“Wonder where she picked up that funny fur coat from?” whispered his Lady.
“Some Commonwealth Charity sale!” said the Lord and both clapped as Shilpa ended her speech on racism to a thunderous standing ovation
“You know something,” said the Queen as she dined with her husband that night, “Didn’t much care for you jokin’ while that ‘what’s her name’ was making her speech!”
The Prince guffawed and the Queen chuckled as the rest of England smiled at the sound of laughter from the palace. That night as she fell asleep Shilpa’s heart felt gladdened to know that Jade was the only racist in the whole of the British Isles.
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